Yo Mama So Fat…Her Favorite Food is Seconds

Big news on the Gates-Gate: apparently the beer and greet will take place on Thursday, and so naturally The Booze Cabinet heartily supports this use of alcohol as peacemaker. In fact, we’ve been advocating drinking and peaceful conversation for years, even before George W. Bush failed at them so miserably (drinking=FAIL; peaceful conversation=double FAIL).

One thing about that whole silliness: I read that arrest report and I’m still trying to figure out why Gates was handcuffed or what crime he committed. Disorderly conduct is such an arbitrary charge, and while I don’t see anything racist about it, it’s still another lame dick move by a cop. Happens all the time. But lame, still. It doesn’t matter if Gates said Jim Crowley’s mama is so fat that when you tell her to haul ass, she gotta make two trips. That’s not against the law. He coulda said yo mama so fat when she auditioned for a part in “Raiders of the Lost Ark” she got the part of the big Rolling Ball. No crime there! But hey, whatever.

As for drink orders, CNN says Obama will be having a Bud and Crowley a Blue Moon. No word yet on Gates’ beverage of choice.

I know I have a reputation for drinking shitty beers but that’s not all true. I love Blue Moon. And Stella Artois, Beck’s, and many wonderful Mexican brews. What’s Obama doing drinking a Bud? Better take off the Mom Jeans before you do that, or we’re gonna be in big trouble.

UPDATE:

What Bill Maher said:

I think Henry Louis Gates was arrested for the crime of not kissing the behind of the police officer.